I’m not sure what guy would want to wear any of these Halloween costumes . . . I mean, they’re pretty much guaranteed to turn women off en masse. But just in case you WOULD want one, this is a public service announcement.
Here are some men’s Halloween costumes on sale RIGHT NOW that will make you look like a jackass . . .
1. “Seymore Boobs Free Mammogram.” It’s a box that goes over your head that says “Free Mammogram” and has a cutout in the shape of boobs for your face.
2. “Genie in a Lamp.” This one is an Aladdin vest and a huge magic lamp that goes around your waist . . . you know, like it’s your junk. And it says “Rub Me!” on the side.
3. “Frank the Flasher.” You’ll get a trench coat, a gray wig that looks like male pattern baldness . . . and a flesh-colored bodysuit with fake junk.
4. (Careful!) “Dr. Seymour Bush, Gynecologist.” This isn’t just a lame pun, it’s a super lazy costume . . . it’s just a white lab coat with the name embroidered on it.
5. “Adult Droopers.” You get a white granny wig, orange Hooters shorts, a cutoff shirt that says “Droopers” . . . and fake boobs hanging out.
This might be the least romantic way to meet someone. But hey, whatever works . . .
There’s a 51-year-old truck driver in England named Mark Ellis. And about ten years ago, he was on his way to a bar when he stopped to use a public bathroom. It was some time around 2005, but it’s not really clear.
(CAREFUL!) Anyway, someone had written a phone number on the wall, with a message that said, “If you want a good SHAG, call Donna.” And he actually TRIED the number.
He sent a text that said, “What are you up to?” He didn’t think anyone would actually respond . . . he just did it as a joke. But someone texted BACK and said, “Who is this?” And it really WAS a woman named Donna.
Her name is Donna Roberts, and she looks like she’s in her thirties now. It turns out an ex-boyfriend had written her number on the wall to mess with her.
But it backfired, because she and Mark hit it OFF. They started dating, fell in love, and they now have two kids together . . . a nine-year-old and an eight-year-old.
A newspaper in England just did a story on them, so that’s why we’re hearing about it. Donna says their kids are still too young for the REAL story of how they met. So for now they think Mark just texted her by mistake.
Dr. Wayne Aldredge, president of the American Academy of Periodontology, demonstrates how dental floss should be used in Holmdel, N.J. It’s one of the most universal recommendations in all of public health: Floss daily to prevent gum disease and cavities. Except there’s little proof that flossing works. When the federal government issued its 2016 dietary guidelines, the flossing recommendation had been removed, without notice. (AP Photo/Julio Cortez)
Well you can finally stop lying to your dentist about flossing.
The Associated Press just looked at the research on the benefits of flossing, and they got the Department of Health and Human Services to admit, quote, “The effectiveness of flossing has never been researched, as required.”
There have been plenty of studies on flossing, but none of them have definitively found that it helps you get rid of plaque or prevents gum disease. The AP looked into 25 of the biggest studies and found all of them were unreliable.
So why has the government been recommending that we all floss every day for almost four decades?
A dentist from the National Institutes of Health summed it up. Quote, “It’s low risk, low cost. We know there’s a possibility that it works, so we feel comfortable telling people to go ahead and do it.”
That’s probably true, except for one thing: Floss is a $2 BILLION market around the world, and half of that comes from the United States.
We found a list online of annoying things you might be doing with your phone. Here are the top four . . .
- Using your speakerphone in public. Don’t make other people listen to your conversation . . . no one cares. And the same goes for playing games with the sound up, or listening to music without headphones on.
- Leaving your keyboard sound effects on. So when you send a text message, everyone around you hears it clicking while you type.
- Including too many people on a group text. Because then everyone gets a million alerts, and they have to mute their phone so it doesn’t ding or vibrate every five seconds.
- Teasing someone with a text bubble, then not sending a text. Meaning you start typing, so the bubble with three dots pops up, and the other person THINKS you’re responding . . . but then you never finish.
It gets awfully hypocritical to judge OTHER people for how they use their phones in public, because I’m guessing we ALL do stuff that irritates other people. But hey . . . let’s do it anyway.
A new survey found the 10 rudest things people do with their phones in public. Check it out . . .
- Playing music, games, or videos without headphones.
- Taking calls on speakerphone.
- Taking photos or videos of strangers.
- Taking a call while you’re eating at a restaurant.
- Having your text and e-mail alerts constantly making loud noises.
- Using your phone when you’re in a dark theater for a movie or play.
- Taking video calls.
- Taking pictures of your food.
- Entertaining your kids with games or videos.
- Using Tinder and other dating apps to find people in the area.