I’m going to go out on a limb and say you don’t like paying taxes. It’s okay, I won’t tell Bernie Sanders on you. So . . . what’s it worth to you to NEVER pay them again?
A new survey asked people what they’d be willing to do for a tax-free future. Here are the results . . .
- Get an “IRS” tattoo, 27% would do it.
- Move to a different country, 16%.
- Clean the toilets at Chipotle for three years, 11%.
- Stop talking for six months, 10%.
- Name your first-born child “Taxes,” 8%.
- Sell a kidney, 6%.
- Assuming you’d get away with it, murder someone, 4%.
- Spend a year in prison, 4%.
The survey also asked people what they’d rather do than work on their taxes. Here are those answers . . .
- Do the laundry, 77%.
- Cut the grass, 60%.
- Teach your kids how to budget, 48%.
- Cook Thanksgiving dinner for your in-laws, 47%.
- Paint your house, 45%.
- Change a baby’s diaper, 43%.
- Talk to your kids about sex, 35%.
- Fold 100 fitted sheets, 32%.
- Miss a connecting flight, 23%.
- Spend the night in jail, 13%.
- Break your arm, 8%.
And finally, 5.7% of people say they’ve already given up and they’re planning on paying their taxes after Tax Day.
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A New Company Will Give You a Loan For Your Wedding . . . and You Only Pay It Back If You Get Divorced
Ask any couple if their marriage will last forever, and they’ll tell you “Of course!” But how many would be willing to bet big money on that? There’s a crazy new startup that’s going to find out.
A company in Seattle called SwanLuv will give you a loan for your wedding of up to $10,000. And you don’t have to pay it back unless you get DIVORCED. Then you owe them the money . . . plus interest.
The CEO of SwanLuv says they ran the numbers, and they CAN be profitable with this model. Quote, “It comes back to statistics. We have the right odds so we’ll be okay.” But he thinks the the odds aren’t TOO crazy, so people will still bite.
When you apply, they’ll evaluate how strong a couple you are. Then they base the amount of the loan and your interest rate off that. There will also be clauses . . . like if the marriage ends because of abuse, the abuser has to pay the full amount.
If you’re interested, you can pre-register at SwanLuv.com . . . that’s spelled S-W-A-N-L-U-V. They’ll officially start giving out loans in March.
The sandwiches they make at Subway serve a purpose: They’re cheap, they’re fast, and they taste . . . okay. Most of their competitors make sandwiches that CLEARLY taste better.
43-year-old Frederick Warren of Chicago most definitely agrees with everything I just said.
A few weeks ago, he went into a Subway, pulled out a knife, and demanded all the cash from the register.
Then he took it, and walked across the street to a Potbelly Sandwich Shop . . . and used the cash to buy one THEIR better-tasting subs.
If you don’t know Potbelly, it’s a smaller chain than Subway that makes a pretty good sandwich. Try the meatball?
The cops caught him while he was still sitting in the Potbelly, finishing up his food. He had $186 in cash on him and the knife . . . and he was arrested.
How much are your EMOTIONS worth? I don’t mean that in a deep metaphorical way . . . I literally mean, how much MONEY are your emotions worth?
The answer is . . . less than you think. A new survey asked people how much they’d pay to feel or stop feeling certain emotions for a moment, and here are the average results . . .
- We’d pay $114 to feel a moment of love.
- $106 to stop feeling regret.
- $100 to stop feeling embarrassed.
- $93 to stop feeling sad.
- $83 to stop feeling afraid.
- $79 to feel a moment of happiness.
- $63 to feel a moment of excitement.
- And $44 to feel a moment of calmness and tranquility.