HELL’S KITCHEN: Chef Ramsay (R) yells at Tek (L) during dinner service on an all-new HELL’S KITCHEN airing Tuesday, Aug. 11 (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT) on FOX. ©2009 Fox Broadcasting Co. Cr: Patrick Wymore/FOX
You hate to see people lose their jobs . . . unless they lose them in a HILARIOUS way. Then it’s fine.
There’s a discussion on Reddit.com where managers are sharing the DUMBEST thing one of their employees did to get fired.
Here are five of the best ones . . .
- “My assistant manager’s register was exactly $3.64 short after every shift. It turns out that’s how much he was spending at Taco Bell for lunch. When we accused him of stealing, he thought we meant all the merchandise he’d been taking.”
- “A 20-year-old new guy called in sick and said he had a stroke. He lived across the street from the store, so we all watched him pack up his truck with beach gear and drive off with his girlfriend.”
- “I had a server take a sip out of a customer’s Dr. Pepper and Coke right in front of them to see which was which.”
- “I had to fire a new dishwasher after she was caught on camera throwing silverware and plates into the dumpster instead of putting them into the dishwasher.”
- “We had a secretary who wouldn’t get anything done. I eventually got fed up and looked on her work computer. I found out she was prostituting herself with her company email.”
I’m not sure any fathers out there need MORE of an excuse to gently ease into a life of wearing sweatpants seven days a week and dipping pizza into ranch dressing, but here you go.
According to a new study out of Yale University, chubbier dads live longer than other men . . . AND they’re MORE ATTRACTIVE to women.
Why? When you lose a little muscle mass and gain a little fat, it actually helps your body shift some of its resources toward your immune system instead of just worrying about feeding your muscles.
And women are biologically drawn to a dad with some chubbiness, because it’s a sign that you’re focused on your kids above anything else . . . including trying to get with women.
So since you’re not interested in them . . . they’re interested in you.
“We’ve had one, yes. But what about second breakfast?” – Pippin
Any diet that encourages me to eat more waffles sounds good in my book.
A new study out of Yale found that a key to losing weight could be eating TWO breakfasts every day: A small one early, then a bigger one a little later.
They say having two breakfasts kick starts your metabolism . . . it stops you from binging on food later in the day . . . it stops you from eating snacks in the morning . . . and it actually helps you lose weight in the long run.
I thought, why not? I figured if his bomb was real, I had nothing to lose anyway.
This MIGHT just be the craziest selfie anyone’s ever taken, and that’s not an exaggeration.
A man named Seif Eldin Mustafa hijacked an EgyptAir flight from Alexandria to Cairo yesterday morning because he wanted to see his ex-wife in Cyprus. And he had a BOMB strapped around his waist.
26-year-old Ben Innes of Leeds, England was a passenger on the flight. And when the flight landed in Cyprus and swarms of cops surrounded it . . . Ben asked Seif if they could take a picture together.
Ben says, quote, “I thought, why not? I figured if his bomb was real, I had nothing to lose anyway, so I took a chance to get a closer look at it.”
Seif was down for a photo, so Ben posed next to him with a grin on his face while a flight attendant took the picture. (Even though he didn’t take the photo himself, it’s a picture he got of himself . . . so does it qualify as a selfie?)
You get a perfect look at the bomb in the photo . . . which turned out to be fake, by the way.
Seif surrendered after a few hours and he was arrested. An Egyptian official said, quote, “He’s not a terrorist, he’s an idiot.”
The “Cake Cleanse” Diet
I’m pretty sure you can’t lose weight gorging on cake and cookies all day long. But it sure would be cool if this was true . . .
40-year-old Deborah Schipper of Sydney, Australia just published a book about a new diet she invented called the ‘Cake Cleanse.’ The big hook is that you get to eat three DESSERTS a day . . . WHILE you lose weight.
It’s because the desserts are made with strategically healthier recipes. That means you’ll be baking cakes and cookies with ingredients like almond milk, coconut flour, and Greek yogurt.
Deborah says she came up with the diet since she couldn’t lose weight. Quote, “because I love sweets and I knew I could never give them up.”
The Cake Cleanse is a four-week program, and it’s pretty expensive. The nutrition plan and the recipe e-books cost a total of $55.
But if you want to lose weight and you really believe it’s possible to make that happen eating three desserts a day, you can buy it at CakeCleanse.com.