The Five Dumbest Things Employees Have Done to Get Fired

The Five Dumbest Things Employees Have Done to Get Fired

HELL’S KITCHEN: Chef Ramsay (R) yells at Tek (L) during dinner service on an all-new HELL’S KITCHEN airing Tuesday, Aug. 11 (8:00-9:00 PM ET/PT) on FOX. ©2009 Fox Broadcasting Co. Cr: Patrick Wymore/FOX

You hate to see people lose their jobs . . . unless they lose them in a HILARIOUS way. Then it’s fine.

There’s a discussion on Reddit.com where managers are sharing the DUMBEST thing one of their employees did to get fired.

Here are five of the best ones . . .

  1.  “My assistant manager’s register was exactly $3.64 short after every shift. It turns out that’s how much he was spending at Taco Bell for lunch. When we accused him of stealing, he thought we meant all the merchandise he’d been taking.”
  2.  “A 20-year-old new guy called in sick and said he had a stroke. He lived across the street from the store, so we all watched him pack up his truck with beach gear and drive off with his girlfriend.”
  3.  “I had a server take a sip out of a customer’s Dr. Pepper and Coke right in front of them to see which was which.”
  4.  “I had to fire a new dishwasher after she was caught on camera throwing silverware and plates into the dumpster instead of putting them into the dishwasher.”
  5.  “We had a secretary who wouldn’t get anything done. I eventually got fed up and looked on her work computer. I found out she was prostituting herself with her company email.”

(Reddit)

Oxford English Dictionary Is Adding ‘Merica, Moobs, and YOLO

Oxford English Dictionary Is Adding ‘Merica, Moobs, and YOLO

oxford-english-dictionary

The Oxford English Dictionary is adding a bunch of new words, and it’s a pretty good round-up this year.  Here are the ten best ones . . .

1.  Fuhgeddaboudit.  Like how Tony Soprano would say “forget about it.”

2.  ‘Merica . . . meaning America without the “A” at the beginning.

3.  Bracketology.  Which you hear a lot during March Madness.

4.  Clickbait.  And another new one is “clicktivism” . . . when you support a cause online, but don’t actually go out and DO anything.

5.  Moobs . . . short for ‘man boobs.’

6.  Non-apology.  When you act like you’re apologizing, but don’t actually say you’re sorry.

7.  Swirlie.  When you dunk someone’s head in a toilet and flush it.  Which seems like it could have been added 50 years ago.

8.  YOLO.  Which stands for “you only live once.”

9.  Squee.  It’s Internet slang for when something’s cute.  They traced it back to an online discussion about Ewoks from 1998.

10.  Kegerator.  A refrigerator with a tap on the front, and a keg of beer inside.

(Here’s the full list, which includes a few R-rated entries.)

(Time / OED.com)

Five Things Companies Do That Keep You From Looking For a New Job

Five Things Companies Do That Keep You From Looking For a New Job

woodleywonderworks

Walking out the front door | Photo Credit: woodleywonderworks | Flickr

A new study says more than half of us say we’d HAPPILY leave our job if a better one came up. And 44% are actually looking for that better job right now.

But we’re not going to focus on them . . . we’re going to focus on the people who WOULDN’T leave their job right now. What’s keeping them so loyal?

The survey found the five things a company can do to keep their employees from looking to leave. Check ’em out . . .

  1.  Paying them more than they could get somewhere else.
  2.  Providing above average benefits.
  3.  A fun work environment.
  4.  A flexible work environment.
  5.  Fitting in with their values.

(PR Newswire)

Was Malia Obama Smoking Pot at Lollapalooza?

Was Malia Obama Smoking Pot at Lollapalooza?

18-year-old MALIA OBAMA was REALLY living it up at Lollapalooza last month, and she probably got a little too wild.  She flashed her booty . . . did some twerking . . . and maybe SMOKED A JOINT.

A so-called “eyewitness” saw Malia toking it up during a Bryson Tiller set.  She says, quote, “You could smell the marijuana smoke.  I saw some young guy hand her a cigarette and she took at least one hit on it.

“She had it in her hand for about one minute, then gave it back to him.”  She even got video of it by pretending to take a selfie right in front of Malia, and then sold it to Radar Online.  Let’s hope Malia isn’t actually friends with this opportunist.

Okay, this isn’t a great look for Malia.  She’s going to Harvard next year, and is regularly named to lists of the most influential teenagers.

Still, it’s “only” pot, which is probably going to be legal everywhere soon enough.  Like it or not, it’s hard to find examples of successful, normal people who haven’t admitted to smoking pot . . . and that includes the guy with 21 gold medals, and the last three Presidents of the United States.

Malia-Obama-Lollapalooza

Kid Makes $1,500 a Night Eating Dinner in Front of His Webcam

Kid Makes $1,500 a Night Eating Dinner in Front of His Webcam

How do people luck into jobs like this? There’s a 14-year-old kid in South Korea who goes by the name B.J. PATOO, and he makes up to $1,500 a night just by eating at his computer.

There’s a phenomenon over there called “mukbang”, which literally translates as, “eating broadcast”. (It’s pronounced “muck-bong.”)

It’s pretty simple: You just sit in front of your webcam and chat with people . . . while eating large quantities of food, sometimes very LOUDLY.

Patoo is one of the most popular mukbangers . . . if that’s a word . . . which is why he makes so much. It all comes from fans, who “gift” him things called “Star Balloons” that cost about ten cents each. And most of his fans are teenagers.

A lot of them say they watch because it’s entertaining, which is weird . . .

Other people say it helps them satisfy their cravings without actually eating . . . which is probably weirder, because when was the last time you turned on the Food Network, and then DIDN’T want to eat everything in your fridge?

Anyway, “Business Insider” says the mukbang kid made about 250 GRAND in 2013 . . . which really makes you wonder why you paid so much for that college diploma.

(Business Insider / ABC News / AllKPop.com)

Kid Makes $1,500 a Night