It’s not exactly breaking news to say that men today aren’t as MANLY as their fathers and grandfathers. But how about some stats to prove it anyway?
A new survey asked guys in their 20s and 60s about different “manly” skills. And here are the ones that are going extinct . . .
1. Shining your shoes. Older men are 38% more likely to know how to do that.
2. Fixing a leaky faucet, 35%.
3. Changing the oil in your car, 19%.
4. Changing a diaper, 18%.
5. Filleting a fish, 15%.
6. Growing and maintaining a nice beard, 12%.
7. Throwing or hitting a curveball, 6%.
There ARE two skills where younger men had an edge. Young guys are 11% more likely to know how to cut their own hair . . . and 2% more likely to be able to make fire without matches. That surprises me. Did anyone tell them lighters don’t count?
A 35-year-old woman named Zoe Jackson from North Yorkshire, England met 46-year-old Gerard Brogan last January on the dating website PlentyOfFish.com.
And they dated for about three months. But Gerard says Zoe started getting too intense. And then she dropped a bomb . . . she had SIX children. So he told her he wasn’t ready to commit, and dumped her.
So how do you get REVENGE when a relationship from PlentyOfFish.com goes south? Zoe snuck into his backyard, and filled his hot tub with . . . plenty of fish. Dead fish.
He didn’t find them until he got home from a trip two days later, and they’d been cooking in the hot water that entire time. So obviously his hot tub was ruined.
Zoe was in court this week and pleaded guilty to criminal damage. She got probation and was ordered to pay Gerard $750.
Talk Like a Pirate Day
Tomorrow, Saturday 19th, is officially “Talk Like a Pirate Day.” That’s the made-up holiday where . . . yeah. But made-up holidays are MUCH less annoying when they involve FREE FOOD.
In honor of Talk Like a Pirate Day, Long John Silver’s is giving away a free fish or chicken tender to anyone who talks like a pirate tomorrow. But you can’t just walk in and say “Arhhhh!” . . . they want a whole sentence.
They even gave a couple examples on their website: “ARR I’ve come to plunder me free fish!” And, “Ahoy, matey! I’ve come for me free fish or chicken tender!”
Krispy Kreme is getting in on the action too. Although we’re not sure what pirates have to do with donuts. Who cares . . . they’ll give you a free glazed doughnut if you talk like a pirate.
And if you DRESS like a pirate, you get even more free stuff. Long John Silver’s will give you a free two-piece fish or chicken tender basket, and Krispy Kreme will give you a dozen glazed donuts. But you have to wear at least three pieces of pirate attire.
It’s not at every location, so go to krispykreme.com/pirate to find one near you, or call your local Long John’s. And go to ljsilvers.com/tlap for their “Pirate Name Generator.”