If you’re dumping someone, is it better to break it to them gently, or just come right out and say it? According to a new study, the gentle approach is VERY overrated . . .
Researchers at BYU gave 145 people a bunch of ‘bad news’ scenarios. And in almost every situation, they said they’d prefer it if the person was straightforward, honest, and fairly blunt about it. Softening it just makes it harder on them.
That doesn’t mean you should just blurt it out with no warning though. Ideally, you want to give them a few seconds to realize they’re about to get bad news. THEN be blunt.
A lame line like “we need to talk” is good enough. You just need to clue them into the fact that bad news is coming. Then follow it up with something straightforward like, “This isn’t working. I think we should break up.”
The study found that beating around the bush any more than that can make it easier on YOU, but not the person you’re breaking up with. So if you drag it out, you’re actually being SELFISH.
The same thing also applies for other types of bad news. Like if you have to fire someone, it’s better to just be straightforward about it.
And we don’t want ANY sort of buffer if we’re getting bad news about our health. We just want the doctor to give us the facts, and be upfront about it.
I remember when I was really young and I could actually stop dating someone because of a minor red flag. Once you get older, you learn to overlook EVERYTHING. “Oh, you don’t ever shower? That’s so environmentally conscious!”
A new survey asked people which of these red flags would make them stop dating someone. Here are the results . . .
1. They’re very jealous and don’t like it when you hang out with your friends instead of them . . . 84% say they’d dump someone over that red flag.
2. They’re really flaky and constantly cancel plans at the last minute, 82%.
3. They keep bringing up their ex on a first date, 78%.
4. They’re rude to your server on your first dinner date, 77%.
5. They flirt with other people in front of you, 70%.
6. Their friends are awful, 68%.
7. They admit they cheated on their last significant other, 61%.
8. After you have sex for the first time, it’s awful and you realize you’re not sexually compatible, 60%.
9. Bad personal hygiene, 52%.
10. You have opposite political views, 48%.
Let’s say you get into a massive fight with your boyfriend or girlfriend, they DUMP you, and storm out. As they go, they leave the door open and your dog runs away and never comes back. Which are you more upset about?
According to a new survey, people would be more upset about losing their DOG than ending their relationship.
On a pain scale of one to 10, people say losing their dog is a 9.1 . . . and a break up is an 8.8.
Here are a few more results from the survey . . .
38% of people admit they love their dog more than their boyfriend or girlfriend . . . or even their spouse.
Half say they trust their dog and their spouse equally.
And 71% probably wouldn’t date someone if their dog didn’t like them.
The modern non-confrontational way to DUMP someone is with a text message. But if you’re too much of a coward to even do THAT . . . this could be your answer.
A 37-year-old woman named Kristy Mazins in Melbourne, Australia just started a new business called Sorry It’s Over, where she’ll dump someone FOR you.
You tell her why you want to end things, and she’ll contact the person to gently but firmly deliver the news. She charges around $4.50 to text or email them . . . $10 to call them . . . or $55 to sit down with them face-to-face.
Kristy says she started the business when she realized the people today in their 20s are tech savvy . . . but terrible at confrontation.
She also says she’s got a knack for breaking up with people so they aren’t devastated. Quote, “I’m quite good at mediating people’s relationships. It’s a gift.” You can see more at her website, SorryItsOver.com.au.