A Nine-Year-Old Is Upset When Santa Tells Him to “Lay Off the Hamburgers and French Fries”

A Nine-Year-Old Is Upset When Santa Tells Him to “Lay Off the Hamburgers and French Fries”

Children today are larger than children used to be. It’s fine, food is delicious, and based on adult weight trends we’re obviously in NO position to judge. But you have to imagine it wreaks havoc on Santa’s lap this time of year.

And he finally snapped. Metaphorically. I don’t mean his leg bones literally snapped under the weight of an American child.

A nine-year-old kid named Anthony Mayse went to sit on Santa’s lap in Forest City, North Carolina last weekend, and asked him for an iPod Touch and a drone.

But at the end of their conversation, Santa told Anthony, quote, “Lay off the hamburgers and French fries.”

Anthony was really upset and started crying, and now his mom wants the city to fire Santa.

The town manager says Santa has apologized, but for now, he’s keeping his job.

(ABC 13 – Asheville

The Hottest Pickup Line Right Now Is . . . “I Wish They’d Teach Us More About Vikings”?

The Hottest Pickup Line Right Now Is . . . “I Wish They’d Teach Us More About Vikings”?

viking-bm9

 

If you’re wondering how to start a conversation with a match on Tinder, here’s the trendiest pickup line right now.  Ready?  Say, “I wish they’d teach us more about Vikings.”

 

 

If you’re confused, you should be, because it’s super confusing.  Here’s how it started.

 

 

A 21-year-old in Michigan named Caitlin Whitlock was going through old stuff at her parents’ house in March, and found a book by the American Girl company called “A Smart Girl’s Guide to Boys”.

 

 

One of the pages listed ways to start a conversation.  And randomly, one of the things they suggested was “I wish they’d teach us more about Vikings.”

 

 

She thought it was funny, so she texted it to a friend.  Not surprisingly, he wrote back, quote, “What the [eff].”  So she tweeted a screenshot of their exchange, and a picture of the book, and it slowly went viral.

 

 

It started blowing up recently, and now people are supposedly using it as a pickup line.  And some even say it’s working.

(Buzzfeed)

Five Ways to Get Out of a Ticket, According to Actual Cops

Five Ways to Get Out of a Ticket, According to Actual Cops

Photo credit: Flickr | Chris Yarzab

Photo credit: Flickr | Chris Yarzab

Two cops recently came up with a list of ways to get out of a ticket if you’re pulled over. And some we’d seen some before, like don’t argue, and know where your registration is. But here are a few you might not think about . . .

  1.  Put your turn signal on as soon as possible, even if there’s nowhere to pull over. That way they know you’re at least trying to. But if they turn their lights AND their siren on, it means they think it’s a good place to stop, so pull over right away.
  2.  Kiss up to them BEFORE they go to their car to run your info. That’s usually when they decide whether or not to give you a ticket. And once they write one, they can’t take it back. Writing a ticket and then ripping it up only happens in movies.
  3.  Don’t be short with them, but don’t talk too much either. They might get suspicious if you give a one-word answer to every question. But they might just get annoying if you start rambling too much.
  4.  Try to make them laugh. Which sounds a little risky, but apparently it works. We’re assuming a bad joke has the opposite effect though. So don’t force it.
  5.  Mentioning that you know a cop DOES work sometimes. So if you can work it into the conversation, go for it. Or if you were in the military or someone in your family is, that might work too.

(Thrillist)

Have Tinder/Hinge Success! 3 things that work to start a conversation

Have Tinder/Hinge Success! 3 things that work to start a conversation

best ways to start a conversation

There’s a dating app called Hinge that’s like Tinder, but only matches you up with friends-of-friends on Facebook. And they just did a study to find out the best ways to start a conversation when you’re doing online dating.

Here are three results that are kind of interesting, even if you DON’T use dating apps.

1. Guys are 98% more likely to reply to ASSERTIVE messages. Women are 40% more likely to reply to FOOD-related things, like “What’s your favorite type of cake?”

2. Men are 25% LESS likely to respond if you wait more than six hours to message them after you’re matched up. But the response rate for women only drops by 5%.

3. People over 35 are more likely to respond to messages about pop culture . . . 29-to-34-year-olds like more personal messages . . . 24-to-28-year-olds respond more to lifestyle questions and things like, “What are your plans this weekend” . . . and 18-to-23-year-olds like weird questions that catch them off guard.

The survey also tested a bunch of pre-written icebreakers to see how well they’d do.

And asking the person to respond with “Two truths and a lie” had the best response rate.

It got 31% more replies than average.

(Bustle)

Hinge – Apple | Android

Tinder – Apple | Android

I Lost $100 Million – And I’ve Never Been Happier

I Lost $100 Million – And I’ve Never Been Happier

money_roof1960

Could you ever have too much money?

What’s the perfect amount?

The “New York Post” just posted a conversation with 46-year-old Manhattan writer and mother-of-one, Suzanne Corso, who used to be a member of the one percent, until her husband Anthony, a financier, lost their $100 million dollar fortune during the 2008 fiscal crisis.

Corso explains that in November 2005, she, her husband and their six-year-old daughter were living in an 11-room suite at the Ritz-Carlton on Wall Street. Corso says she was appalled by the excess since she grew up on food stamps in Bensonhurst, Brooklyn and she felt like she and her husband might be raising a spoiled kid.

Then three years later, Anthony blew his entire $100 million dollar fortune during the financial crisis. Corso says “looking back, it was the best thing that ever happened. Hanging out with the uber-wealthy was dull and empty.

If someone handed me $100 million today, I’d give it back in a heartbeat.” She experienced private planes, yachts, exotic safaris, and hanging out with celebrities, not to mention having three vacation homes in the Hamptons and on North Fork, and sending her daughter to private schools.

After everything blew up, they had to rent a two-bedroom apartment in Battery Park City and Anthony got depressed.

Corso decided to become a writer, and her book, “Brooklyn Story,” became a best-seller in 2010.

Her latest book, “Hello Hollywood,” was published last month.

Source: NY Post