There’s something so masterfully LAZY about this.
Apparently, people are now eating oranges in the SHOWER . . . because it helps them avoid the sticky mess that comes from eating them in normal places.
And the trend is spreading because people are sharing pictures of their “shower oranges” on social media. Of course they are.
I’m not sure this really counts as a silver lining . . . but if there IS a zombie apocalypse one day, at least it’ll be over quickly.
Researchers at the University of Leicester in England just finished up a study on ZOMBIES, and they figured out that it would take less than 100 days for the zombies to kill or infect everyone on the planet and totally wipe out humanity.
They estimated that every zombie would have a 90% chance of infecting one person per day or eating their brains.
That would make the infection spread twice as fast as the Plague did in Europe in the 14th century . . . and it would drop the population from 7.5 billion people to just 181 people in 100 days.
But . . . there is some hope. Those numbers don’t account for us FIGHTING BACK.
If every person has a 10% chance of KILLING one zombie every day, we could kill off all the zombies within about three years.
And the few hundred people who managed to avoid getting infected could begin repopulating the Earth . . . although it would take about 27 years before the population would really start recovering again.
A new study out of Cambridge University in England found that money really CAN buy happiness . . . as long as you spend it on the right things. It just depends on your personality.
They split people into five big personality types, monitored what they spent money on for six months, then tested them to find their general happiness levels. Check it out.
- People who are open should spend money on entertainment, and hair and beauty products to be happy. They should avoid getting traffic tickets or taking on a mortgage.
- Conscientious people should spend money on insurance, and health and fitness. They shouldn’t spend money on gambling, toys, or hobbies.
- Extroverted people should spend money on entertainment and travel. They shouldn’t spend money on lots of insurance or an accountant.
- People who are agreeable should spend money on charity and pets. They should avoid getting traffic tickets and gambling.
- And neurotic people feel BETTER when they spend money on traffic tickets. They also like gambling. But they should avoid spending money on hotels.
We found some GREAT new advice on how to get in shape quickly. We’re just not sure if you should take it. Ready? Just . . . quit your job.
A new study out of Sydney University in Australia found a good way to get healthy is to stop WORKING.
They found that people who retired got an extra 93 minutes of exercise every week . . . spent 67 fewer minutes every day sitting . . . and slept for 77 more minutes every night.
People were also more likely to quit smoking once they stopped working, and got to spend more time on their hobbies and other stuff they actually like.
The researchers say that when you stop working it, quote, “creates a great window of opportunity to make positive lifestyle changes. It’s a chance to get rid of bad routines and engineer new, healthier behaviors.”
Of course, none of this really works unless you’ve got enough money to avoid stressing out about not having a job. So, you know . . . hopefully you kept listening until I said THAT, and didn’t quit your job 45 seconds ago.
This Christmas, like every Christmas, there’s a chance your significant other is going to give you something HORRIBLE. So how are you going to react?
A new survey asked women what they do with a particularly bad gift. Here’s how they handle it . . .
- 33% return it immediately.
- 25% actually wear or use it to avoid hurting their partner’s feelings.
- 20% re-gift it.
- And 10% sell it on eBay.
The survey also found 40% of women now pick out what they want their significant other to buy them . . . and 30% practice looking thankful in the mirror in case they have to react to a present they don’t like.
Women also named the WORST gifts they’ve ever gotten. Here’s the top 10 . . .
- A chainsaw.
- Nose hair trimmers.
- A fishing pole.
- A fossil.
- Hair removal cream.
- A dustpan and brush.
- A sweater with an alien printed on it.
- A tube and funnel to help pee outdoors.
- Cellulite cream.
- A cleaning wash for their lady parts.